


A Temporary Silence

by SpookyScaryScully



Category: The Strain (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angel lives, Established Relationship, F/M, Human/Vampire Relationship, Love Confessions, Pining, Reader-Insert, Vaun Lives, also this is all from reader pov so I might do more from his pov??, can you pine for someone you're in a relationship with?, or atleast trying to be a love confession, strigoi "cant" be in love but vaun aint like that cheif, you sure as hell can
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-11
Updated: 2018-12-11
Packaged: 2019-09-16 04:00:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16946604
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpookyScaryScully/pseuds/SpookyScaryScully
Summary: He told you Strigoi couldn't fall in love.The same can't be said for you.





	A Temporary Silence

It’s there, burning white hot at the tip of your tongue when your lips meet his in a tender kiss in the privacy of your shared room. It’s still there hours later when you suit up with Gus and Angel, daylight is burning bright and Quinlan and Vaun have to be left behind while the three of you search out for supplies. The words are still there, ringing in your chest as your hands gently squeeze his, trapped behind the gentle smile you give before turning away and heading out to the van. 

You had always been open with your affection, never hesitant to lay out a gentle hand on a shoulder in need of comfort, never waiting long to open your arms to give out a tender hug; and with every I love you that passed from your lips, be it to friends, family, even a stranger that had granted you a random act of kindness; it was always truthful, always genuine.

Then why were you so afraid to say it to him? 

In actuality you knew why. 

He had told you in the beginning when your friendship was newly forming. He had answered every question you had about the Strigoi, to a certain degree. Telling you about how the infection spread, about how to kill them. He had expressed annoyance when you asked why he and the other sun hunters were not like the others you had encountered in the streets. You didn’t like the look of crossness that marked up his face.

The questions ceased for now.

They started up again, later on when the dynamic between the two of you had started to shift. You had come across one your friends, their skin ashen, their hair now nothing but a few misplaced strands, calling out to you with a tenderness that felt all too familiar. You knew what they were, why they were here, and still you reached out. Hoping that maybe your gentle call of their name would be enough to overpower the voice of the master you knew whispered in the back of their mind.

When the stinger started to slowly emerge, you knew that your hopes were in vain, and in that moment, you resigned yourself to your fate. This was your fault; your nativity had led to this and you were going to have to deal with the consequences.

The pain never came though. The moment the stinger was ready to lash out a silver spike emerged through their head, and a hand had reached out and grasped you tightly by the back of your jacket, dragging you back from the explosion of white blood and worms before any could think to touch your skin.

When you turn around, the look that you had hoped to never encounter again was back, but this time it was marred by others, fear was one of them, you thought. You never expected that Vaun could look fearful, but the wildness of his eyes, the tightness of the hand on your shoulder despite the absence of a threat told you otherwise. There was something else there, something that sent an ache blooming within your chest.

You didn’t get to dwell on it though.

He had yelled at, or rather raised his voice. The anger evident in every word. He had told you before, that they weren’t who they used be anymore. That they cared not for you, but what was inside. The blood flowing through your veins igniting the only feeling they could ever feel. Hunger.

“So, they can’t feel anything?’ you asked, the slightest tremble running through your voice, you hoped that he would mistake it for fear of the encounter you just had.

“Nothing” he replied.

Not even love? You had whispered 

He hesitated, but only for a second 

“Especially not love”

You told yourself then and there that you weren’t going to fall in love with him. To often in life had you given out your entire heart, only to receive it back broken and shattered. Each time it took you longer and longer to put the pieces back together. You knew then that in this case that is what would happen, he had told you that his kind couldn’t feel, so why would you try.

Yet the weeks passed by and the closeness between you two had grown, until eventually it culminated into harsh kisses against a stone wall after a successful night on hunting. Until it was the gentle grasp of his ungloved hand in yours. It became forehead touches as the two of you stared into one another’s eyes, his cut mouth pulling into the strangest, yet sweetest smile, and hours upon hours of holding onto the other when it came time for you to sleep at night.

And the times at night where he could bring you to the highest high with nothing to receive in return, yet he insisted that he was satiated by your pleasure, you knew not loving him was no longer an option.

His stinger has never touched you, never pierced you. The worms that flow throughout his body never posing any harm. Yet you are infected, not by the ailment of a Strigoi, but by the very essence of him

You still think about saying them hours later, you’ve returned to the safety of your underground home, and when you see Vaun there, already waiting, The I has slipped past your lips before you have time to stop it. One of his eyes has cocked up in curiosity, and you know that he can hear the thundering beat of your heart. You smile up at him, ignoring the way your mind and heart are screaming at each other and reach out to one of the straps on his vest.

“I missed you” you say, before pulling him down for a tender kiss.

You can hear Gus groan in the background, hear his “It was only 4 hours” and hum against Vaun’s lips, lifting up one of your hands to flip him off and he and Angel laugh, making their way past you. You pull away though when you hear Angel utter out the word love and feel Vaun stiffen slightly.

He’s never brought it up, you want to but the fear of rejection sends a sharp stab through your ribs. Yet when you look at him; look at eyes that are black and red. Eyes that shouldn’t be able to portray much emotion burn into you with such fondness that he insisted he wasn’t able to feel, the hope bubbles up that maybe, maybe he loves you too. 

Night has fallen, tonight it is just Vaun, Quinlan and Gus going out to hunt. You don’t mind it, in fact you are happy about it. Your inner turmoil has started to make you ill, and while Vaun is off with the other two discussing the plan for tonight you’ve already headed off to bed. 

As you close your eyes you wish for the thousandth time that he could sleep too, just for the chance for you to finally be the one that stood awake as he slept, to be able to gaze upon his relaxed form, prone and completely content, you wish for the chance to be able to stroke his cheek without him knowing as you whispered the words that had threatened to spill from your lips more times then you could count. You just wished to finally let them be out in the open.

He enters the room, but you do not open your eyes, feigning sleep. You’ve slipped up too much today, and you need to rest, to recoup, to build up the facade once again. You feel the bed dip.

He is affectionate with you, over the course of your relationship he has learned that he is allowed to want this; has indulged in it. It is still you though who is the primary giver, so when his hand comes up to feel your head before softly caressing down to cup your cheek your body acts on its accord, pressing into his burning palm as you sigh.

Still you remain motionless, your breathing is even and you thank whatever god there is that your heart is relaxed. The bed dips further, and you feel the gentle press of lips against your head, then your cheek, once, twice, before the weight is gone and you hear the sounds of his retreating steps, the barely audible click of the lock as the door shuts.

You’re alone once more.

Your hand makes its way over to his side, it’s still warm despite him having been barely there. You imagine he is though, your hand resting on the spot where his cheek would be, your eyes looking up to where his gaze would lock onto yours and finally, finally you let the words I love you out.

You don’t let yourself think past that, even in your imagination you can’t tell what his reaction would be, and to have your heart break at an illusion was not something you were up for tonight.

Instead you let the words fades out into the small room. You know that eventually, and sooner then you wanted, they would come out, and you were preparing to brace yourself for whatever may happen after that.

For now, the silence remains, however temporary that may be.


End file.
